Thirties

If we don't live life the way we want to we will end up regretting it and resenting our parents. As a teenager, we feel passionate about our future and do what we can to fight for the things that we want. We dare to dream and know that if we focus, we can make it happen. Then when we approach our twenties, we focus on the present. We enjoy what is in front of us while we work towards building our future and remind ourselves that one day we will get to where we want to be. You don't really realize that soon enough, you are already twenty-nine. 

Then one day passes like any other day, but thirty hits you like getting pushed out of a moving vehicle. You look around and wonder how you got so far and comfort yourself with thoughts like "thirty is the new twenty" hoping that you can believe that. Unfortunately, as you put on a facade to make people around you believe that being thirty is the best, you can't help but feel discouraged that you have not reached your goal and is still waiting for the day where we will eventually get to where we want to be. Unfortunately this time, we feel stuck and unmotivated. The future feels like something of the past. We feel lost of focus and ambition and is comfortable with where we are and would rather stay suffering in our current situation then to explore something new because we are afraid of what the consequences are. In a way, we are just happy with what we are familiar with regardless if it is good or bad. 

This is what I have come to realize after watching the first episode of Ali Wong: Baby Cobra on Netflix. Her skit made me realize that I am sitting here in my thirties, trying to turn my life back around while realizing and regretting what I failed to accomplish in my twenties.